Legend of the Candy Cane

Legend has it that the candy cane dates back to 1670. A choirmaster at the Cologne Cathedral handed out sugar sticks to his young singers to keep them quiet. He bent them into hooks in honor of the Living Creche ceremony. Historically this seems true, but the legend of the candy cane means much more to me.

A couple of years ago on the day after Thanksgiving, we were on the hunt for the perfect Christmas tree. We stopped at a few tree stands and had not found the perfect tree yet. Somehow we ended up at Home Depot. Home Depot sold trees, and to our surprise Santa was there too. My nieces sat with Santa and had their picture taken. 

At this point, Logan was already pacing. I should have realized something was wrong, but I didn’t.I told both the boys it was their turn to sit with Santa, and Logan said he didn’t want to. I insisted. Logan sat next to Daniel and Santa. Santa gave them each a candy cane. After we left Santa, we took another picture at one of those stands where you stand behind it and put  your head through the  cutout. Logan seemed fine.

As we walked over to the Christmas trees, I felt something hit me in the back of the head. I looked down and saw that it was a candy cane. I turned around and asked who threw it, and Logan said, “It was me,and I meant it.” I was shocked. He doesn’t behave like that. I sternly told him that throwing candy canes at anyone’s head was inappropriate. We continued to look  but couldn’t  find the perfect tree, so we left and headed to another tree farm.

I sent Daniel in the car with my mother. Logan and I rode together, and as soon as we got in the car Logan started to cry. He explained that he had kept telling me that he didn’t want to sit with Santa and I made him anyways. He knew that wasn’t the real Santa, and he didn’t want to speak with him. He cried the entire ride. He yelled. He let it all out while we drove. It wasn’t just about Santa. He brought up things that he had been holding onto for a while. It hurt to see him like that. I realized that I hadn’t been listening. Not just listening,but observing. Noticing what was wrong without Logan speaking. I learned a very valuable lesson that day.

We found a tree at the next farm. Logan played on a wooden train and his behavior started to return to normal. The tree farm employees tied the tree to the top of the car, and we started back to my parents’ house for pizza. Two minutes into our ride the tree slid off the top of the car and landed in the middle of the road. I pulled over, backed down the road and threw the tree into the trunk. We made it back to my parents house in one piece, and eventually we made it home to decorate the tree.

I will never forget that day, and since Logan has such a good memory, he will never forget it either. Just last weekend, I walked out of Walmart and the local fire department was driving Santa around visiting all the children in town. As I stepped out the door, Santa drove by and reached out to hand me a candy cane. I cried. It was my reminder that in this very difficult time of year I need to pay more attention to what my children need. I need to listen to everything they have to say and help them work through all the difficult things in life, even activities as small as a picture with Santa.